Lessons In Life - When The Student Teaches The Teacher: By Mary Murray

     Upon opening the door to the break room, I saw the young man sitting quietly, with a crochet hook and a ball of turquoise yarn, busily working. I asked what he was doing and he said, “I’m making a scarf.”

     How is it that you crochet, I asked? “I have autism and this calms me down,” he responded matter-of-factly.

To say that I was impressed was an understatement. First, here was a tall, strapping young man who had no qualms about crocheting in a public setting. Second, he ‘owned’ his disability, which I found refreshing, insightful, and a testament to his maturity.

     Previously, Alex had been a client at Goodwill, volunteering at various stations throughout the Summit store. Under the gentle guidance of Job Coach, Andre Lyons, Alex transitioned from a client to a sales floor employee. Now the tables were turned, and Alex was the teacher, giving me a few lessons.

     “Crocheting is way for me to deal with anger issues,’’ he explained, when pressed on how he came to embrace the hobby. I felt pretty inadequate after that. Here is a 20-year-old with the wisdom and insight to find a productive way to deal with his emotions. As for me, I had simply given up on this crocheting thing. 
     Being a natural leftie who is forced to live in a right-handed world, I bumbled and failed miserably over the years as right-handed crafters tried and tried again to teach me to crochet. I had resigned myself to the fact that crocheting was simply not in the cards for me, but nonetheless, it irked me that I couldn’t get the hang of it.
     Alex would have none of that negative talk. “You can do it,” he said. He sat with me and ever so patiently allowed me to fumble with the hook and yarn, before gently coaxing the first, then the second, and then a row of double crochet stitches. The next day he surprised me with a gift --  a small ball of gold yarn and a crochet hook so that I could practice. He checked in on me every few days, inspected my work, and told me to rip out my mistake – more than once! The role reversal was quite amusing, but I dutifully complied.

     I have learned a lot from Alex – how his patience could make a difference for me, but also the wisdom and insight this young man commands with regard to his life and in handling his emotions. Thanks, Alex. Oh yes, a scarf is coming your way!